Proof Of Life

Very well, to demonstrate that we are reasonable people we can show you this photo as Proof of Life.

You will note how content the prisoner is. Keeps telling us this is much better than the last place he stayed. However, he keeps getting drunk and eating all our crackers.


In return for this proof of life and to compensate us for the beverages and biscuits we have some new demands.

A promise not to wear matching tennis apparel.
The immediate cessation of Tuna fishing.
Total and absolute ban on Desperate Housewives.


Finally we propose a prisoner exchange. You can have the Cup back in exchange for Darryl Hair. We will give him some lessons in ball tampering (Afghani Style).

We will contact you again when the time is right.

Terry Wrist

 

Cove Pirates

The dark forces of sporting ambition have for too LONG taken for granted the rules and spirit of the Cove Cup and the Cove Pirates have now struck back to right the wrongs of the last dark years.

Remember Rule #1

( The Longs cannot win)

The hostage will not be harmed ....for now....as long as the following demands are met:

1. Immediate renunciation of the title
2. Extra large guerkins every Monday
3. Free legal advice for all

You have 7 days to comply with these demands or else.........we have power tools and know how to use them.